I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
