Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
