Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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