She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Panties = found
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