i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
