He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
