we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
even my farts smell like vagina
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
