Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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