she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
