Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
