We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
