So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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