it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
The uberlube is also flammable
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
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