im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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