I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize