Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
