They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
