If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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