it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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