Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
