on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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