they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize