big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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