I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
