This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
