I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
