Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
