guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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