you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
