some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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