what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
