A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
