yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
