How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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