she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize