I'm drive I can fine osifer
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I have tasted many bathrooms
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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