I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
