Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
