You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
