When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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