I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
