I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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