Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
