Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
