It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
