yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
