I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Randomize
