Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
