kristin has been a bad kristin
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
