he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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