the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
